Udaipur or Woke (Imagine That)

 

Po Boy Views

By

Phil LaMancusa

Woke

Or

Imagine That

            The difference between then and now; the difference between the haves and the had nots of yesterday and today; the repurposing of the real and of real estate. The entirety of the mad dash clash of past, present, future and the ones who move up and the ones that fall down. “They are the same people only further from home, on a freeway fifty lanes wide on a concrete continent spaced with bland billboards illustrating imbecile illusions of happiness” (Ferlinghetti).

            I’ve changed over the years of my lives, escaping from the projects and parents, side stepping prospects of prisons and poisons pursuing a profession and being always on the cusp of the finer positive points of prosperity; relying on personal progress for peace/a piece of my mind that is being continually blown by me the hungry gatherer constantly overtaken by the successful hunters.

            Folks my age, our experiences lost in the space of time and the lessons and larks that lead us from relative comfort to an eventual downsizing ‘retirement home’ abandonment with one foot in assisted living and the other avoiding the slippery slope of a six foot hole all the while hoping that the next one to go is not another one that we love or worse, us ourselves. You didn’t know me when I was a younger man and I won’t know you as an old person. So it goes.

            Million dollar condos and high priced essentials; shaving with a brush and a bar of soap while my taxes line the pockets of manic mansplainers telling me how good they have made life for me and mine; property values continue to become fatter and my pockets leaner; my spirit contentiously swimming against the undertow of historic mendacity concerning the salvation of my eternal soul, as if the promise of heaven will fill the bellies of hungry children while the rich donate to rebuild cathedrals dedicated to a carpenter’s son who died for their sins. The picture of the ragged man sitting on his milk crate at the intersection; his sign reading “Anything Helps, God Bless”.

            The rent for one month of an apartment two blocks from where I grew up would have paid our living expenses for almost five years and that would have been for a family of six. Where does the time go and where does that kind of money come from?

            The great recession of 2018 is coming to bite us in the behind as the bubble is busting while our credit cards get maxed out trying to rob Peter to pay Paul and finding out that Peter has been financially kicked to the curb; even the low spark of high heeled boys cannot escape the percentage we’re paying while we’re living beyond all our means because the man in the suit has just bought himself a golf course with the profits he’s made on our fears and our dreams. The sound in the distance is not a dog barking but the laughter of Anubis taking our coins for our ride with Charon.

            It matters not because we’re witnessing islands of plastic debris as mega companies use solar power to make frakking less expensive. They rape and we must pull up our pants and stumble on being the last generation to walk freely on this planet; the impotence of our good intentions paving the road to hell.

            I have a neighbor who walks to the bus stop once a week to go to Walmart; he rests on the stoop next door to us and happily explains how he’s looking forward to celebrating his ninety-fifth birthday. May we all be so fortunate; from our mouths to God’s ears; walking to the bus ride to Walmart amid the chaos confusion and detritus of a collapsed planet; walking to the bus ride to Walmart.

 

Writer's picks 5/21

 

Phil’s Picks

Best First Date Place

        So you want to know if they’re the one that you want to know; here’s the real test. Pull-A-Part 4401 Peters Rd. Harvey, La. 504-243-6660 Call it a salvage or a junk yard, I call it wonderful; you know you can always use some spare parts for your ride. They have vehicles laid out like a cemetery (one by one); they’re computerized for easy finding of your prey. Bring tools and patience and that new friend; believe me, if they pass this test, they’re worth holding on to. Worth the price of admission ($2.00) and you’ll get your picture taken.

Best Vegetarian Lunch Date

        Want to really score big on the vegetarian dating scene? Take them to Burger King  2727 Canal Street 504-681-9367 drive thru for a couple of Impossible (veggie) Whoppers and some shakes, go sit in the parking lot at Goodwill, 3400 Tulane Avenue 504-482-1046 eat your delicious lunch while chatting about this and that and then go do some light shopping ( you’ll always find something!). I guarantee this outing will bring a smile to any veggie’s face and if not, let them fade like denim from your life. Reward them with a PBR at Pal’s 949 N. Rendon 504-488-7257

Everyone Knows But You Best Local Meal

        Kebab 2313 St. Claude St. 504-383-4328 From ketchup to kebabs all made in house, fresh baked bread daily for sandwiches, hummus, couscous, pickles, beets and nine house made sauces (including the infamous Skhug, Coco-habenero and Harrisa), craft beers, cocktails in coconuts, Portobello po-boys with Spanish garlic sauce, falafel and friendly service. Eating in house, pick up, bicycle and Uber-eats delivery service. Tall towers of rotating pork and chicken turning slowly on spits and specials on weekends. A neighborhood place with high standards and local roots. Mention them to friends and they’ll say “Oh, I know that place, I love it”.

Claiborne overpassass

 

Po Boy views

By

Phil LaMancusa

Claiborne Confusion

Or

Junction Misfunction

        Okay, I’m no personage of importance, knowledge or authority; in fact, the older I get, the less that people want my opinion or wisdom of experience. I also only know the basics of history, but I do possess degrees in sensitivity and logic from the School of Hard Knocks. So be it. Here goes and I’ll say this in bold:

“DO NOT TEAR DOWN THE CLAIBORNE OVERPASS!!!”

        The back story of that two and a half mile carbuncle is that over fifty years ago big government was giving away butt loads of money to cities to promote roads and bridge construction and New Orleans wanted their share of the booty. At that time a plan for a highway connection for our interstate had its proposal resurrected, in fact, there were two plans; one plan had an overpass hugging the river, going through the historic French Quarter, the other would dissect the historic Treme neighborhood. This was way before we had our first black mayor (Ernest ‘Dutch’ Morial 1978-1986).

        In 1965-6 we made a deal with the devil; while the African Americans of the Treme neighborhood were focusing on civil rights, the white “historic preservationalists” surreptitiously argued against ruining the Quarter with construction which would take up to three years. In fact, I’m told that at one time both plans were floated to occur but one had to be decided on and guess which one did? The residents of the Treme had no idea of their screwing until the first bulldozers appeared to plow down the hundred year old oaks that lined the street. While the French Quarter remained sacrosanct the Treme was eviscerated, cut in two like a grill cheese sandwich. Needless to say the Quarter flourished while Claiborne Avenue in all its history, commerce and traditions faded like denim.

        Now big government is giving away more money and we have contractors and construction companies salivating at the thought of getting some of that booty. Well I say:

TURN IT INTO GREEN SPACE!

        Why not? Think of how long, how much of a mess and how much environmental impact tearing that monster down will have on that area; look at the examples of the Napoleon and Louisiana Avenue digs that took years. Look how it took about a year and a half for us to get one body from the Hard Rock site and then more months to tear THAT sucker down. Look at the conditions of our existing streets and tell me if that money couldn’t be spent better on your block.

        Now, think of how bike paths, greenery, walkways, mini-theaters, playgrounds, music venues, food kiosks (above AND below) and access for Indians and second lines to really parade could impact that panoramic structure; think of the greenery that it would encourage. For every dismissal of this idea there is a positive rebuttal and the nay saying falls flat when answered with

“WHY NOT?”

        Hard to get to? No, we have overpasses that challenge bike riders as much (consider the access to Crescent Park, the bridge climbs on Wisner and/or Broad St.). Hasn’t been done? New York City’s High Line is an example and Google cites eighteen urban projects like that: Chicago, Atlanta Toronto, Rotterdam and damn Paris even! Is the space too wide? How about some tennis courts, exercise fields or children learning agriculture projects?

        I was in San Francisco when the highway running along the waterfront was torn down; it took years and destroyed businesses and housing and I foresee that it will do the same here. I predict a failure of marketable real estate only to be replaced by a repurposing that will put the final nail into the coffin of America’s first African American community. What do you suppose will happen to Circle Foods or the Mother In Law Lounge or other businesses and housing for the Black community that have weathered the gas fumes and noise? And where are you gonna put all that damn debris? Landfill it?

        Once again, I’m no expert on these types of things; however, don’t you think that instead of putting our people to work destroying and hauling two and a half miles of construction detritus to the dump that we employ them as gardeners and builders of an elevated green space to be enjoyed by residents and visitors alike? Community groups would love a chance to put a thumb print on this newer, saner, alternative to the chaos and noise of demolition; wouldn’t you?

        So, what can we do? How can we work this? How about this: call 311 and/or City Hall and tell the Mayor that you are for the Claiborne Green Space plan and then get (at least) two more people to do the same. Tell these two (or more) people to each get two more people to call and tell two more people etc. etc. With this geometrical sequence in two weeks we would have 32,768 callers and that might get some attention and all we have to do is each get two people to call. I mean, if this isn’t an infrastructure project then what is and why not?

        And if we don’t, we abet a graveyard instead of a playground. Think about it. Talk about it. Share and expand.