Saturday, July 7, 2012

In New Orleans: Yes Virginia


Po Boy Views
By
Phil LaMancusa
Dharma Bums
Or
Yes Virginia
            Yes, My Darling, I’ll tell you the story about a French Quarter that was long ago and far away; so far away that it might have been on another planet or a parallel universe. The time I speak of is one when bohemians roamed the Quarter and the Italians still lived here. From The CafĂ© u Monde to the end of the French Market, as far as the eye could see, there were seafood markets, cafes, vegetable stalls and shops that sold ordinary household supplies. There was a gas station, post office and hardware stores. There were no tee shirt shops, visitor information shills and no one sold (or wore) Mardi Gras beads (except during Carnival). This was a time before hand held electronic devices, parking meters and hand Grenades. Baby Boomers were in grade school; Gen-Xers were not even a gleam.
            Rent was more than reasonable, coffee houses were owned by individuals and bars didn’t have blenders or stock Red Bull. Roaming the streets in the sunlight were market workers, shoppers making groceries, kids throwing newspapers and carts delivering seafood, beer, ice and fresh vegetables. When (and where) shadows fell were artists, writers, musicians and hipsters; the avant garde; the bohemian; the existential. This was just before Hippies and just after dinosaurs; there were places to get your car fixed, your shoes soled and your ashes moved (if you get my drift). Bourbon Street was for middle class adults with live music in the strip and burlesque joints.
Black families communed, the gay community thrived and Dharma Bums waxed poetically on philosophical premises over cheap wine, espresso and chess boards. Broccado had an ice cream place, Cosimo Matassa had a recording studio, Faulkner and Tennessee Williams had cheap apartments, you could run into Hemingway at the bar of the Monteleone Hotel. Reuters had a feed and seed store, Puglia had a grocery, LaNasa had a hardware store, Lubat’s had a restaurant supply, by god. The French Quarter was made up of three classes of people: the poor, the mostly poor and the truly poor. It was the days when people repaired their own cars and you could get parts for those cars in the French Quarter. Small publications were printed here and flourished. That was then and this is now; those rag tag ne’er do well, raconteurs and salts of the earth are either dead and gone or decaying in nursing homes on the outskirts of town. And yes, Virginia, the Bohemian legacy has been priced out of the market.
In the publication Urban Studies vol. 42 no. 7, Kevin Fox Gotham (Dept of Sociology, Tulane) discussed the socio-spacial transformation on New Orleans Vieux Carre (French Quarter) using causal dynamics and employing heuristic devices. He had a lot of facts and figures from sixty years of census’ and drew allegories, comparisons and depressing realities across twenty four pages; interesting reading.
Here’s the way it boils down: we’ve had at least three recessions since the seventies, we’ve had the oil business leave the area and manufacturing jobs tanking. This causes a drop in employment and residency. The taxes from income take a dip so the powers that be focus on taxes that they can bring in from sales. So, redesigning the French Quarter (indeed New Orleans in general) into a visitor driven economic machine, investing in things like gambling, sports arenas, festivals, convention centers and hotels; World War II museums (and now, hospital complexes). Property values go up (X3) as do rents (X7); gentrification is encouraged.
Since 1960, in the French Quarter, businesses catering to residents go from 143 to 26. Tee shirt, souvenir and daiquiri shops go from 58 to 259. The transformation into a tourist city and a vigorously marketed entertainment destination works its magic, the poor (white and black) are squeezed out. Interesting enough housing rental vacancies are higher and rose from 9.5% to 38% in that same time period.
The population of the French Quarter has gone from about 12,000 in 1960 to a little over 3,200 in 2010; there are 2,000 buildings in the French Quarter. Where does that leave us? Affordable apartments turned into expensive condominiums; hardware stores turned into offices and cafes; the second floors above expensively rented tourist shops are left vacant; doorways and hallways are turned into fortune telling enterprises. There is no pride on Bourbon Street.
And now, yes now with the economic downturn across the country, the almighty disposable tourist dollar is disappearing. After the turn of this century (2000) the population dropped below the 1940 level and the lowest since then; the last big hurricane dropped it further and still housing is unaffordable.  There aren’t job offering in any sector unless you want an early Sunday morning stripper shift at Big Daddy’s. Still, the ability to sell alcohol 24 hours a day seven days a week keeps the ball rolling; the income from sales and taxes of beads, booze and broads is funneled to feed our less than functional infrastructure. But I digress.
Yes Virginia, I am nostalgic for a simpler time; when imaginations were limitless, as well as possibilities; when I thought in musical and poetic cadences; when I dreamed in Technicolor; when my spirit floated like a little kid on the big swings. I read books, I thirsted for knowledge. Let me tell you of a time when I could afford to be poor and happy
“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us”.  

Friday, July 6, 2012

Willie Lump Lump


Willie Lump Lump
Or
The Homecoming
            The newspaper headline read: “DEAL WILL HAVE THE CITY BUZZING UNTIL 2024!!!” Willie had no idea what any of that meant. In fact, Willie didn’t know much about nuthin’.
            Willie only saw the newspaper in snatches; the trash where he foraged for leftovers; counters of convenience stores where he bought his liquid diet; and  through them little windows in the vending machine while fishing change from the coin return. It was all the same to him; he didn’t know “The DEAL” from diapers and didn’t much care. Willie was a Man About Town, a Bon Vivant and all around Good Time Charlie. Willie lived out of a shopping cart where he kept spare clothing, liquid diet (in cans and bottles) and his makeup.
            Willie lived with Mags, his “forever whatever” in a camp under the wharves of the New Orleans French Quarter, which he liked just fine. Mags was his partner in crime and they cohabitated, imbibed and performed together on the streets for spare change and laughs. The “Gruesome Twosome” as they were known, hadn’t drawn a sober breath in years and the prospect of them doing so in the foreseeable future was dubious; and that, was also fine with them.
            They were as crazy as shithouse rats and they knew it, nurtured it and worked it. They went to sleep at dawn’s crack and slept until they woke up. They dressed in funny clothes and raved like the lunatic harebrained thespians that they considered themselves. Willie favored a clown’s red rubber nose; an accessory that he wore like a badge of courage.
            One afternoon Willie awoke, got a tall drink of breakfast, and hoisting his pint in one hand and a salvaged cheerleader baton in the other, turned to Mags who was still abed in their cardboard, driftwood and newsprint boudoir. “The breakfast of champions is curiosity; Liebling, demanding explanation and experiences” he proclaimed.  “I come with a staff of fennel from Dionysus and Clytemnestra, my only love; seasoning carnal attraction with ghost peppers and habaneras, fanning flames into frenzies of revelry and debauch!” Mags took an offered pull and tossed him the near empty pack of Lucky Strikes.
            “And, good morrow to you Mistress Penitent Brothel,” Willie quipped as he lit up. “Have you rested well? And please explain yonder supine figure that I spy upon our sacred shore.”
            “Well, Willie,  s’the  same’s we saw this mawnin’; remember, when you was ‘splainin’ to me about the sun rising in the East over the Westbank? Still there, as we both can see. Too big to be a fish; might be a ‘gator, tho, I doubt it…. Maybe it’s a dead body.”
            Willie had taken a step toward the lump by the shore of the Mighty Mississippi. At the mention of the words “gator’ and ‘dead body’ he took a judicious step (or two) backwards. Mags, keeping up her end of the conversation, would not let it drop and kept up with the seemingly endless bizarre possibilities.
            Ambergris?” (Willie took another step forward),
            “Sea serpent?” (step back),
            “Pirates treasure?” (two steps forward);
            “Ooorrrrrrrrrrr, your reprehensible and irascible Uncle Lamarr who has been in a knife fight with vicious Albanian seamstress terrorists, brutally and maliciously masacreed, stabbed hunneds of times with rusty pinking shears and hem rippers; forced to eat Lucky Dogs and doodlebugs by the dozen, had his trousers drawn up in the supreme wedgie and his organs and entrails ripped from hi; and, is now lying face down in a pool of his mortal embarrassment because of the shape that he will be in when he meets his omnificent and glooooooorius maker!!” (Willie took a dive back under the covers and was shivering with fright).
            “Or” Mags continued with a mischievous grin “maybe it’s just a bag of trash” (Willie took a peek out).
            “OH MY GOD….IT”S MOVING!!!!” (Willie sqealked (new word), covered his mouth, ears and eyes in rapid succession; then, snatching the blanket, covered his head and whimpered audibly
            True enough, the lump became animated, adjusting its form to become figure-like (although resembling neither animal nor vegetable). It seemed to expand and contract like a blob-il-itious (another new word) yawning of intimidating wet wash on laundry day. Only alive!
            Willie:WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?”
            “What the hell is that?” echoed Mags, seeming to yell at Willie over the pounding in his ears. By this time Mags had joined him under the covers in time to see Willie’s manliness exert itself for the love of his woman (not that kind) and the protection of his home and territory. Sobering suddenly and tossing the covers aside, he turned to her and said: “Well, I’m not gonna… sure as fuck… sit here like some candy assed punk! Mags, you stay here and if I don’t come back… well…” and left it at that.
            He hitched up his cowboy pajamas, put on an air of indestructibility and armed with a brick bat went to confront the interloper (whatever it might be). Upon reaching the ‘apparition turned into stark reality’, the thing reared up to a seven (or eight) foot height and turned upon our hero. Willie got the impression that he was confronting a giant simian of some sort; the word ‘Orangutan’ came to mind and he was not wrong by a long shot. It was indeed a huge cloaked Orangutan and it opened its mouth revealing fangs the size of railroad spikes; and turning its bloodshot little primate eyes on Willie,  it thus spake (which is Southern for spoke):
            “Fear not for by the Sacred Seal I have come in peace; lo, as witnessed before, I am among you again. I have returned for the cleansing of your world. You may know me by many names; Some have called me Buddha; some called me the Christ,  Ananda Marga, Vigi Kumar, Mohammad and/or Elvis; some call me Maurice. You may call me Maitreya. I have incarnated again upon your shores to take up my mission preaching words of salvation and enlightenment.  It is here that I will build my church; I will deliver my message in the streets to the poor of spirit. I will heal the sick, raise the dead and make little girls talk out of their head. Yes verily, I’m the one they call the Seventh Son. By the way, do you happen to have a mint?”
            Willie shook his head and walked back to Mags who asked nervously: “Well….?” “Some nut,” Willie said. “Let’s get ready for work, I’va feeling it’s gonna be an interesting night.”
           

Writer's Awards from New Orleans


Po Boy Views
By
Phil LaMancusa
The Other Writers Awards
Or
Stress Rehearsal
The world has gone nuts. The planet has gone nuts. We’ve got natural disasters, manmade disasters, wars, pestilence, a screwed economy worldwide, global warming disguised as ‘Climate Change’ and there ain’t a logical, rational mind in charge of any portion of it prepared to make changes to the universal mindset. To me, the way things are going is just sick and wrong; but do they listen to me? Noooooooooo.
Here’s some of my personal peripatetic picks pointing my fickle finger at our existing fates, fortunes and foibles. These are all true (and true opinions), I swear.
‘State of the Onion Award’: In Arizona, the state government has placed into law that life begins two weeks before conception!  What does this mean and how far can we take this silliness? Does this mean that every woman in Arizona is pregnant? Even illegals? Think about it. Can the human race get any more dim-witted? One good thing, though: their minimum wage is two bucks higher than ours.
‘Brass Monkey Award’: A young man walks into a restaurant (stop me if you’ve heard this) and starts clearing plates from the tables and bringing them to the dishwasher; he has an apron on and no one questions him. Before the ‘get a clue phone’ rings, the young man walks out of the restaurant with three cell phones and a purse that he also cleared from the tables. Question: Should we say “only in New Orleans?”
Overheard at the waitress station: “my mother wears glasses, but she’s stupid”.
‘How’s This? Award’: Here in New Orleans our streets run with the blood of innocents and nobody takes it seriously enough to question the prospect of gun control while up in Baton Rouge, the governor is looking forward to relaxing restrictions on owning and carrying guns (with the urging of the NRA). I’m looking forward to a time when we have a same sex married couple in the governor’s mansion or even in the white house; they’ll straighten our asses out, I’ll bet.
‘Speaking Of Which Award’:  when we advocate for the right to same sex marriages we hear statements from right field in the vein of: “it’s not in the bible” or “next you’ll say that it’s okay to marry my cat”; “there oughta be a law” and my favorite “two people of the same sex cannot reproduce and so should not be allowed to marry”. How hindered are we that we actually care about something as nebulous as the institution of marriage? Question: if we license marriage should there be a written test? A renewal clause? An expiration date before ‘death do us part’? Should we only be able to be married to only one person at any one time? Should it be against the law for people that are not married to live together, have sex and children? And why can’t I marry my cat if I want to?
The ‘Too Much Information’ Award: A sporty red car pulls into the intersection of St. Louis and Chartres St. you know, the one where no one can figure out the right of way? The driver’s confusion is confounded because he has a cell phone up to his ear with one hand and the other hand is busy picking his nose. He is frantically looking in all directions. Question: should I go pee on his car?
‘Say it isn’t so (or say it is so)’ Award: Watching a documentary called “Bag It” we’re brought up short on how the planet is being done in by that insidious product that we know as plastic; fooddemocracy.wordpress.com tells us that we use 1.6 billion gallons of oil each year just to make the plastic bags that this country uses. AND they are not taken as recyclable by our city. In fact recycling in this city is still taking baby steps; there is not city recycling in the French Quarter and none is offered to businesses at all. We’re not recycling glass products, compost or lawn trimmings as do other cities. Why? Have you ever seen anyone in this city remember to care about the environment? Possibly two. If we raised our voices we might raise awareness, but face it, our citizens ain’t big on speaking out and City Hall has bigger fish to fry.
‘American Idle’ Award: I don’t know if you’ve noticed, and you’d have to be myopic not to see, the epidemic of young healthy Homo sapiens and their canines standing at intersections and crossroads with hand lettered sign asking for money. They proclaim homelessness, helplessness and defenselessness. With downcast demeanors and pleading eyes they beg our help; day after day after day. I’ll say this: that position either pays real well and perpetuates itself or these kids don’t know when it’s time to try another way to earn a living; look for me when I retire with a sign that says “Old And In The Way” I bet I’ll clean up.
Lastly (for now) ‘The She’s Got Freckles On Her Butt (she’s pretty) Award’:  “I hate to be the one to tell you…BUT” and then someone goes on to happily horrify you. Compound this by the “I’m not a bigot; It’s none of my business; I’d lend to that ten spot; I’d love to; you’re sweet to ask; and, that’s a great idea… followed by the ‘But’ word. Using the ‘but’ word is the way to get away with saying exactly what is on your mind without taking responsibility for it. It’s a way of getting out of things; it’s a way of saying no without saying no. “I know you want that, but… “;  “I know I promised, but…”

Saturday, June 2, 2012

Sgt Pepper in New Orleans


Lonely Hearts Club Valentine
You’d think that after coming here for years he would be on at least a nodding acquaintance with some of the regulars; but no, no one pays him any mind and I doubt if he’s about to become anybody’s buddy any time soon.
He comes in quietly around 6:15 or so and takes a seat in her station. You would think for a guy his size that you’d notice him more; but no, it’s almost like he materializes at the table. He quietly orders his dinner, never asking for anything special, usually drinks ice tea, eats slowly, pays with cash and leaves. There’s no evidence how he gets to or from our little restaurant haunt and his manners and tips are always… gentlemanly. No one at The Top Hat Diner knows his name or where he lives. He’s just some guy that comes in and doesn’t bother anyone; that’s good enough for everybody. When the staff refer to him at all it’s just to get his order and get him taken care of, they call him “Sergeant Pepper”
She works part time and sees him on her days there. She treats him with the respect deserving of a customer who knows what he wants, causes no waves and is respectful of her and the duties that she has to perform. He doesn’t waste her time with idle conversation and isn’t glued to the stupid television watching dumb sports like the rest of the guys who frequent the place or hang out at the bar; whoopin’ and hollerin’ when some fool catches a ball or knocks somebody down. Not at all like her husband (ex-husband now) does; did.
And, so he’s overweight, wears glasses and his hair is thin. So he has a silly mustache and doesn’t smile much; who is she to judge? He’s nice enough in his own way and who would she be to talk anyway; she’s no homecoming queen herself, right?
Sure, she tries to cover up her gray hair and wear smart saucy dresses like the other waitresses but, if truth be told, she’s past the knowing how. It took her a while before she understood what the other waitresses were talking about when they said to ‘let the girls out’ for bigger tips from men customers. Then Lucille, the server that had been there the longest, showed her how if you show just a wee bit of cleavage that men will give you more money. At first she was taken aback, but soon saw the truth about it when the other girls told her how much money they made by doing that. Not that she needed a lot of money; after all, she had gotten the house after the divorce and her two almost grown boys had gone to live with their father. She had taken her mother in and they lived quietly in the suburbs and had few expenses; however, she would like to feel attractive to somebody sometime, maybe even a little sexy. But, she had been out of that kind of circulation for so long, she kinda didn’t know how to… or even how to know if or when she was. She thinks she kinda knows how he feels. Alone.
Actually, Sergeant Pepper’s name is Gene and he lives just up the street from the diner and is, in fact, alone. He lives in the garage apartment of the house that his parents left him when they passed and he rents out the main house to cover just about all the bills that he is likely to incur. He works at the library in the reference department and pretty much keeps to himself.   His apartment has all he needs for his solitary existence, bedroom, bath, kitchenette, and a sitting area for his reading. He takes most of his meals out and has an old one eyed tom cat named Mr. Whiskers. He learned at an early age that he was not good looking, strong, agile or charming. He was, he thought, from birth, clumsy, fat and unattractive to any but his mother. He was not invited to parties or outings and was not good at any sport. He lacked the ability to be glib or quick witted and couldn’t tell a joke to save his life. At an early age he resigned himself to go through life unaccompanied (except for Mr. Whiskers) and to die alone. He figured that if he didn’t expect much from life that he would never be disappointed. He liked the waitress that served him sometimes and was glad that she didn’t wear low blouses like some of the others; it embarrassed him when he looked up to request dinner and found himself staring into a woman’s cleavage. He had gathered that her name was Loretta.
The Top Hat, as well as other places is closed on holidays; and so, here we have Gene and Loretta who will, unless something out of their ordinary existence and relationship happens, spend the holidays alone except with their ordinary companions; and older parent and a one eyed cat named Mr. Whiskers. Nothing special will happen to these two seemingly ordinary people unless something out of the ordinary occurs to disrupt their ordinary lives.
It’s as if they’re shadow dwellers; the last people that you would think of inviting over or out; however Gene and Loretta have a lot to say, if someone would take the time to listen. Perhaps one day they’ll start by talking to eachother. They might go out for a walk, maybe they’ll like the same movies, the same flavor of ice cream, the smell of the fresh cut grass after the rain. Maybe, if you wish it for them, they’ll spend the holidays with eachother.

Friday, June 1, 2012

Simian Sez Redux


Po Boy Views
By
Phil LaMancusa
Miss American Pie
Or
Ape Talk
               Simian sez: the madness can be stopped. Counterproductive things that do you today (yes, ‘that do you’) may be the result of past inequities. Attitudes and prejudices that people exhibit are not present at their birth; counterproductive tendencies are a result of training that is strengthened by losing sight of the fact that, collectively, we all have nothing in this form but our futures and that it’s pointless not to be making the most of the short time that we have.
Okay, you’re sitting down in your favorite chair, bone tired, after (another) full day of working your ass off for enough dough to keep your head above water, a roof over your noggin and the bill collectors away from your door and you say to yourself :“I guess this is just about as good as it’s gonna get.” Question: Is it time to quit your job, join a cult, hit the road and surrender to the futility of your existence?
Suppose you’re on your favorite barstool, watching Jeopardy with the gang and trying to figure out what dinner ‘s going to be, what DVD you’re gonna pop in the player before you settle in to reruns of Frazier or Golden Girls, taking Fido out and flossing another day away. And on that sultry, sweet smelling, siren wailing evening you asked yourself: “When I’m frigging eighty-five and walking some fleabag, will I wonder where my life went and what function I served?” Question: Should you order another double, find out if the circus is hiring or consider doing a ‘flying novena’ to Saint Expedite?
Or, say that you’re on your morning run, after a skinny latte and bran muffin at Starbucks; looking forward to a long shower and then off to university to earn that MBA, pull down some serious bucks in the work place and after purchasing a cute condo, meeting the right person and having two point six children who you’ll send to your alma mater and blah blah blah (you know how your mind works when you lay one Nike sole down after another on the St. Charles streetcar tracks). Except today you’re thinking that, actually, all you are is a randomly constructed piece of protoplasm with no apparent purpose on the planet, destined to last X amount of time, to perish and be thrown away like that plastic Alpine Spring Water bottle that you just threw into the garbage receptacle; you, your loved ones and the horse that you rode in on…so much molecular landfill.
Perhaps you’re the youngest kid from a Seventh Ward brood walking to school in unpleasant weather trying to forget the recurring dream of the nothingness of death; of trying to scream when no sounds come out, of trying to run and your feet stuck in mud. Your headphones yelling hip hop lyrics, homework undone, lunch money tight and indifferently observing as a young girl offer herself to a man in a pickup truck. It occurs to you that you didn’t ask to be born; and no amount of encouragement, prescience of possibilities or glimmers of greatness will dispel the pessimism of your ghetto gloom. You figure your tombstone will read:”Three ways out: music; sports or dealing drugs; he weren’t no good at none of ‘em. He’d a run away but t’weren’t no place to go…”
How about a hundred million people on earth that feel that life’s pleasures are fleeting and it’s miseries pervasive; the bus driver who’ll be going to a funeral when he gets off; your waitress raising her children on her own; the bank teller whose hours have just been cut; the shopkeeper whose Small Business loan is defaulting; the musician whose van was just stolen; the shop girl who just found a lump; the guy in clown makeup who didn’t know that growing up would be like this or the veteran school teacher that lost her savings in a bad investment. Salt in wounds that God is supposed to be healing.
It’s “LIFE” that wakes you to a sunny day and then proceeds to mug you with circumstances beyond your control, leaving you praying for a good case of amnesia.   It’s called non-clinical depression when your mental levees crumble and, “Cryin’ won’t help you; prayer won’t do you no good”.
The theory is that the cause of non-clinical depression is basically the witness of our own mortality; our glimpse of death; the proof of our insignificance. We get it from experiences of life that show us how powerless we really are: a physical beating; debilitating illness; sexual abuse; bullying, teasing; hunger for food and nurturing; unrequited love; death of someone close. Something that…     kills    our    spirit    (even for a brief time). A dashing of our hopes for divine intervention or happy ending that we bury and cover with a protective layer of personality or futile diversion. 
What results (?): a tendency to become introverted; angry; aggressive, goal oriented and/or complacent? A dependency on a higher power, sarcasm, self medication, cynicism or a philosophy of existentialism?  Insatiable appetites, a mania for exercising, nervousness, anorexia or cruelty towards small animals and weaker people? Doesn’t that all sound like a laundry list of the ‘human condition’?
      Question: Who gives solace to the tired, comfort to the weak, strength to the poor; hope to the disillusioned; stature to someone with low self esteem? Who provides poultices for life’s bruises; lifts up the downtrodden; swings low the sweet chariot? Answer: Nobody.
Heaven, hell, reincarnation and life after death are all hearsay. You have from this moment forward to make your life sane and enjoyable if only you can forgive your past and put it to bed. And then it’s just one foot in front of the other onto a better path.  The monkey speaks. 


Election Speculation in New Orleans


Po Boy Views
By
Phil LaMancusa
The 99% Articulation Speculation
Or
2012 Elocution Solution
March 25, 2012: “Less than 2% of eligible voters under the age of 30 turn out for primaries (Tufts University civicyouth.org)) and that accounted for 8% of voters overall”.
            Here we go: In the polling place where I work, out of 2,298 names in my book, only108 registered voters turned out for the Presidential primary/City Councilperson-at-large elections this year; of that number only14 pulled a Republican lever. Citywide we goosed only 18% of registered voters. In the runoff for Councilperson-at-large we went up to 23%. Does your vote count? The winner took the race by less than 300 votes.
            However, let’s not feel like Lone Rangers in New Orleans; voter turnout in the state and, in fact the entire country, is pitiful at best. Only 61.6% of the registered voters turned out for the 2008 Presidential election (mmcdon@gmu.edu). That this country is the leader of the free world doesn’t say much for us as voting citizens, does it?
I’m not sure of the rest of America, but here in New Orleans, the same people turn up to vote regularly and I can pretty much count on seeing them coming to cast their votes. What that means is that the same people are making the decisions for all of us; especially for the complacent that don’t show up. Is voting important? Well, let’s just say that if you have any challenges with your environment in general (or specifically for that matter) there is someone in the infrastructure of government that you can call and get action. That person is probably elected and somebody voted them in; if not you…who?
          Less than 2/3 of registered voters cast ballots for the last president and his opponent.

 They made that decision for the other 1/3. They also made that choice for everyone else, 

including all the people that could’ve voted but didn’t register, so couldn’t cast a ballot. Does 

that say something to you? It should.
            Let’s be frank here; we live in an imperfect world whether we pay attention to its iniquities or not. I personally have not met anyone without some concern/ complaint. Obama took office with 53% of the vote; the Bush before him at 52%. Question: what would have happened if a larger percentage of voters had turned out? Question: what would happen in this country if, like Australia, it was illegal NOT to vote (yep, don’t vote in Australia and it’s gonna cost you!)? Would/should more citizens pay attention to the way their country is run and raise a voice to what happens? Think about it.
            The economy, cost of living, joblessness, street repair, gas prices, educational opportunities, health coverage and accessibility, rampant crime, drug addiction, racism, sexism, ageism, homelessness, reproductive rights, licensing, animal abuse, your electric bill, child welfare, zoning and property taxes (Christ, all them friggin’ taxes), the environment and climate change, the endless processions of armed conflicts, the  parking Nazis, domestic abuse, gun control, television content, noise pollution, litter, commercialism, immigration, bullying and that fool who almost ran you down because they were on their cell phone, blaring music and not using a turn signal or looking where they were going! There’s an APP for that! That APP starts with a phone call, email or letter that begins with the sentence: “As a concerned voter……”
            There’s someone in the government infrastructure that is supposed to be looking out for us; somebody voted them in and you and I can vote them out! 1% of the population controls 99% of the wealth and pay lobbyists to influence elected officials by donating to their election campaigns. That bites the big one especially because the 1%-ers still only get one vote each; so, who’s the fools?  We are (the we that doesn’t think that it’s important to take part in the process).
            The problem of not being able to affect/effect change occurs with a reluctance to stand up for what we believe in. Call it what you may: lethargy, indolence, apathy, weakness, powerlessness, a feeling of disenfranchisedness or just not giving a rat’s whisker until… until we run into a roadblock in our lives and realize that we have no control over the rules that have been set in place by other people who do not give a rat’s whisker about our lives, and the lives of our loved one’s; like your job being outsourced, your streets needing repaired, your kid’s school or your local clinic being closed. How about having your healthcare premium skyrocket, your neighborhood park being bulldozed to make way for a big box store, your choice of manufactured goods being limited to ones made in a third world country or your favorite fishing spot becoming polluted because that chemical plant upriver is allowed to dump waste in your waterways? Is this land really your land?
            Has it occurred to you when you watch on your television a country going on strike, marching in the streets and confronting governments that resist the power of the people that we have very little of that going on here? Is that because we have so much power as a people (?) or because we have nothing to complain about (?) or because we are basically the servants of the 1 %-ers and simply incapable of making our wishes vigorously known? Is it: “Pity please the ones who serve… they only get what they deserve.” (?)
            Surely, in every society there are sheep, there are wolves and there are shepherds who keep watch and defend against wolves because of what they do. I think we need more shepherds here; they see to what we are supposedly guaranteed in this country: the right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.
This is my August counsel: consider our future, debate it, get and stay informed, speak your mind, encourage voter registration and participation. Get involved.

Friday, April 20, 2012

The Monkey Speaks in New Orleans


Po Boy Views
By
Phil LaMancusa
Miss American Pie
Or
Ape Talk
“And the three men I admire most
The Father, Son and The Holy Ghost,
They caught the last train for the coast.
The day the music died.”
Okay, you’re sitting down in your favorite chair, bone tired, after (another) full day of working your ass off for enough dough to keep your head above water, a roof over your noggin and the bill collectors away from your door and you say to yourself :“I guess this is just about as good as it’s gonna get.” Question: Is it time to quit your job, join a cult, hit the road and surrender to the futility of your existence?
Suppose you’re on your favorite barstool, watching Jeopardy with the gang and trying to figure out what dinner was going to be, what DVD you were gonna pop in the player before you settle in to reruns of Frazier or Golden Girls, taking Fido out and flossing another day away. And on that sultry, sweet smelling, siren wailing evening you asked yourself: “When I’m frigging eighty-five and walking some fleabag, will I wonder where my life went and what function I served?” Question: Should you order another double, find out if the circus is hiring or consider doing a ‘flying novena’ to Saint Expedite?
Or, say that you’re on your morning run, after a skinny latte and bran muffin at Starbucks; looking forward to a long shower and then off to university to earn that MBA, pull down some serious bucks in the work place and after purchasing a cute condo, meeting the right person and having two point six children who you’ll send to your alma mater and blah blah blah (you know how your mind works when you lay one Nike sole down after another on the St. Charles streetcar tracks). Except today you’re thinking that, actually, all you are is a randomly constructed piece of protoplasm with no apparent purpose on the planet, destined to last X amount of time, to perish and be thrown away like that plastic Alpine Spring Water bottle that you just threw into the garbage receptacle; you, your loved ones and the horse that you rode in on…so much molecular landfill.
Perhaps you’re the youngest kid from a Seventh Ward brood walking to school in unpleasant weather trying to forget the recurring dream of the nothingness of death; of trying to scream when no sounds come out, of trying to run and your feet stuck in mud. Your headphones yelling hip hop lyrics, homework undone, lunch money tight and indifferently observing as a young girl offer herself to a man in a pickup truck. It occurs to you that you didn’t ask to be born; and no amount of encouragement, prescience of possibilities or glimmers of greatness will dispel the pessimism of ghetto gloom. You figure your epitaph will read:”Three ways out: music; sports or dealing drugs and he weren’t no good at none of ‘em. He’d a run away but there weren’t no place to go…”
How about a hundred million people on the earth that feel that life’s pleasures are fleeting and it’s miseries pervasive; the bus driver who’ll be going to a funeral when he gets off; your waitress raising her children on her own; the bank teller whose hours have just been cut; the shopkeeper whose Small Business loan is defaulting; the musician whose van was just stolen; the shop girl who just found a lump; the guy in clown makeup who didn’t know that growing up would be like this or the veteran school teacher that just lost her savings in a bad investment. Salt in the wound that God was meant to heal. It’s life that wakes you to a sunny day and then proceeds to mug you with circumstances beyond your control, leaving you praying for a good case of amnesia.   It’s called non-clinical depression when your mental levees crumble. “Cryin’ won’t help you; prayer won’t do you no good”.
The theory is that the cause of non-clinical depression is basically the witness of our own mortality; our glimpse of death; the proof of our insignificance. We get it from experiences of life that show us how powerless we really are: a physical beating; a debilitating illness; a sexual abuse; bullying and teasing; hunger for food and nurturing; unrequited love; death of a loved one; something that kills our spirit, even for a brief time. A dashing of our hopes, for a divine intervention or a resulting happy ending, that we bury and cover with a protective layer of personality or futile diversion.
What results (?): a (what can be called abnormal) tendency to become introverted; angry; aggressive, goal oriented, complacent? Self medication, dependency on a higher power, sarcasm, cynicism or a philosophy of existentialism? Insatiable appetites, a mania for exercising, nervousness, anorexia or cruelty towards small animals and weaker people? Doesn’t that all sound like a laundry list of the ‘human condition’?
Question: Who gives solace to the tired, comfort to the weak, strength to the poor; hope to the disillusioned; stature to someone with low self esteem? Who provides poultices for life’s bruises; lifts up the downtrodden; swings low the sweet chariot? Answer: Nobody.
Simian sez: only you can stop the madness. Counterproductive things that do you today may be the result of a past inequity; attitudes and prejudices that people exhibit are not present at their birth; tendencies are a result of training with you losing sight of the fact that basically you have nothing but the future in this form and you should be making the most of the short time that you have. Heaven, hell, reincarnation and life after death are all hearsay. You have from this moment forward to make your life sane and enjoyable; if only you can ignore your past and put it to bed.
Easier said than done. First you have to fix the things that are broken now and rid yourself of the things that impede your progress; quit unhealthy behavior and influences. Eliminate the negative. Clean house.
Realize that you can depend on nothing and that everything depends upon you. To reprogram yourself start with right speech which will result in right action and be followed by right thoughts; one foot in front of the other.  You’re not here to break even and be lost in the shuffle.
The monkey speaks.